Hello everyone! Could you please advise, my daughter is 3 months and 3...

1 год назад Дарья 1г5м Барнаул

Hello everyone! Could you please advise, my daughter is 3 months and 3 weeks old, she only falls asleep in my arms and swaddled at night, and sometimes she needs to be rocked for her daytime naps too. How can we transition to self-soothing? Or is it too early? If so, when should we start working on this? And when is it best to stop swaddling? I would really love to hear about your experiences in this regard! 🙏

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Вера

4г8м

My experience is such that it's best to back off from the child. No matter how many times I tried to encourage self-soothing to sleep, it always ended up in tantrums and thoughts that I was doing something wrong and not coping. Self-soothing at such an early age isn't really necessary for anyone. It will come naturally as the child grows older, around 2.5 years and beyond. True self-soothing is when the child understands on their own that they want to sleep, goes to bed by themselves, closes their eyes, and waits to fall asleep. What you need is not self-soothing, but for the child to fall asleep quickly and easily with minimal wake-ups afterward. This is only achieved by consistently adjusting their routine. Simply put, if it takes a long time to fall asleep at night, it means they've slept too much during the day. You need to increase their wake time. Wake the child if they sleep too long. At 3 months, this is very difficult to manage because they dream a lot. You have to monitor each nap and also increase wake time as soon as falling asleep becomes uncomfortable, takes too long, they wake up frequently, or have too short naps. In short, there are many nuances. For example, at 10 months, after putting her down for the night, she would wake up after 40 minutes and then it would take another 40 minutes to put her back to sleep. She would fall asleep while breastfeeding and wouldn’t let go. It was advised to reduce her nighttime sleep to 10 hours. Wake her up in the morning. The very next night, the child fell asleep within 10 minutes and only woke up for feeding after 4 hours, and then simply continued to sleep afterward. The next time we saw the magic of routine adjustment was when she was 2 years old. I weaned her from breastfeeding. We temporarily removed her daytime nap. The child began to fall asleep almost on her own and slept through the night. Although when there was more sleep, she still woke up at night for feedings. But now, she has only recently learned to keep her eyes closed, so how can there be self-soothing?

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Дарья

1г5м

Вера , "I heard you, thank you for the answer!"

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Анастасия

7г10м 2г6м

My youngest has only been able to sleep in arms during the day since birth, and for the first 4 months at night, he slept in his own crib, waking up of course for feeding and rocking. Then I brought him to my bed, and he started sleeping much better. By 6 months, he was sleeping through the night without waking up, falling asleep without rocking; I just needed to lie next to him. Now he is 1.4 years old, during the day he goes to sleep when I say "let's go to sleep," he takes his pacifier, and I lie down with him and wait. At night, we bathe him, and he also falls asleep on his own with his pacifier while I lie next to him until he falls asleep. With my older child, we had to rock him like crazy until he was 3 years old 🤦🏻‍♀️ but he never slept in arms at all. However, falling asleep was a problem. It really depends on the child.

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Дарья

1г5м

Анастасия , About our bed with my husband, there's no way to even talk about it) Our daughter has been sleeping in a cradle since almost birth, and now in a crib. We only co-slept for the first three weeks while I was breastfeeding. As I understand, it also depends on the child whether they can fall asleep on their own or not. Thank you for sharing your experience!

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🌈Филана🦋

2г7м

We swaddled for the first 10 days and that's it, while we were in the hospital. Once we got home, we stopped using swaddles; the baby moves more, learns to control their body, and gets acquainted with sensations and touches. As for falling asleep, it depends on the child. Some children fall asleep on their own, while others need to be rocked or need someone to lie next to them and feed them, etc. You just have to adapt. Generally, babies fall asleep in someone's arms; it was the same for us, then it became enough just to breastfeed and the baby would fall asleep. It greatly depends on the baby's condition (colic, gas, developmental leaps, teething, etc.). All these states occur in phases—periods of fussiness, restlessness, calm times, etc. Listen to your child, feel what works best for you and the baby, and listen less to know-it-alls. Everyone is different; what's good for one can be harmful for another.

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Дарья

1г5м

🌈Филана🦋 , I often notice that my daughter falls asleep by herself while sucking on her bottle, but more often she needs to be rocked to sleep. Regarding swaddling... I can't even imagine how she would have been falling asleep calmly all this time if she wasn't swaddled, especially since her Moro reflex only recently started to fade. Thank you for your response!

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🌈

🌈Филана🦋

2г7м

Дарья , The Moro reflex is present in all healthy infants, and swaddling has no effect on it.

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Дарья

1г5м

🌈Филана🦋 , Yes, but it affects the baby; my daughter couldn't sleep peacefully because of it, she kept waking herself up, and I decided to swaddle her at night for a peaceful sleep.

Ответить 1 год назад

Айкоша

3г5м 1г5м

Your son is about the same as your daughter; they only swaddled him in the maternity hospital. As for self-soothing, we don't have that. We don't even have it with our older daughter; you need to lie next to her and pat her on the bottom.

Ответить 1 год назад

Supermoms

Hello! Every child is unique, and there is no definitive answer to the question of when it is best to start teaching a child to fall asleep independently. However, it is usually recommended to begin this process around the age of 4-6 months. To help your daughter transition to falling asleep on her own, you can try gradually reducing the time you spend holding her before sleep. For example, start putting her in her crib when she is not fully asleep yet but is already drowsy. You can also try using cozy bedtime rituals, such as reading a book or singing a lullaby. It's better to wean off swaddling gradually, starting with daytime naps. You can try leaving your child unswaddled during the day so that they can move freely and feel comfortable. Gradually, you can stop swaddling at night as well. It's important to remember that each child develops at their own pace, and the process of learning to fall asleep independently may take time. Be patient and support your child through this process. Good luck!

Ответить 1 год назад

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