Mom of two kids and more, were you afraid of childbirth that you could…

Mom of two kids and more, were you afraid of childbirth that you couldn't give enough attention to the eldest child? I've been worrying about this lately, I'm scared that my son won't get enough attention ? since from the beginning of pregnancy I stopped spending more time with him... Often lay in the hospital, sick...? and now for a month he hasn't been with me ? His grandparents and granddads take turns! A week with one, a week with another grandmother with grandfather... But it's necessary, because of the symphysis I need peace...??‍♀️ I miss my son very much... ?? see him once a week... I'm afraid that he thinks that he