Girls, hello! Suppression of oneself is awful and scary, thankfully I'…

Girls, hello! Suppression of oneself is awful and scary, thankfully I'm trying to get out of this state. It seems better though)) I need a little support, I would be grateful for your mutual understanding??? With milk, I can't make friends with it, maybe it became more but not fatty. As after feeding, the baby pinches and fusses that there's not enough food. Or falls asleep and wakes up every 5 minutes. I had to switch to formula. Relatives come over and see that I feed him formula, they say about refusal from breastfeeding and so on. I already dig myself a hole every day, I can't feed him from my heart alone. I experienced